Sunday, October 6, 2013

Matters of the Heart

We had to wait a month, but the Bronco arrived here the other day.  After further conversations with John and Tim I will write about that major adventure in a later blog.

According to Katie in the book Kisses From Katie, there will be a time when my heart becomes reconciled to loving people in different parts of the world.  I will be able to be in one place without mourning the absence of the other.  I'm not there yet...

I opened a large bin brought in from the Bronco and I was immediately back at home in Tennessee in my kitchen.  There was my favorite coffee cups and my crock pot and my best spoon and knife.  I started to cry.  I wasn't expecting that.  Touching these things was like a whisper from home.  It was very nice and very difficult.  I guess I am mourning the loss of familiarity.  Mourning the loss of time spent with my children.  Mourning the loss of all that I have known for the last ten years in Tennessee.  My heart still hurts when I think of these things.  But I believe that God knows my heart better than I.  He knows the pain of separation.  His own son was separated from him and God couldn't even look upon Jesus.  I can't imagine that kind of anguish and pain.  God can be trusted.  His words are true and I can know that I can do all things through Him.  God will lead me to a place where I can be in one place, separated from those that I love and not feel this pain in my heart.  I'm just not there yet.

Along those same lines Dennis and I got to Skype at our home church, Greater Life Church in Lexington, TN.  It was so good to see all those that we love.  It was awesome to be a part of the praise and worship.  Pastor Jamie had a great sermon.  We got to see our children attending church with our grandchildren.  It doesn't get much better than that.  My heart feels a little better already!

Love You Guys!!!
Thank you Lord!!!

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